So from what my mom tells me...I was a really bad sleeper! I was sick all the time as a baby, hence not sleeping.
People always say..."oh, you will really start to appreciate your mother, when you become a mom". When people would say that to me as a teen, I would think "shut up"! "I am a great kid, always have been, always will be...my mom should be grateful for me!"
Well now I am TOTALLY and COMPLETELY sticking my foot in my mouth. (disclaimer: grace is a wonderful baby, I am grateful for her, she is wonderful. I love her lots and lots, and am so glad she is part of my life...she just needs to sleep) I have got 8 and half months of my life with little or no sleep! I have tried countless times to get Graces sleeping under control, and have failed every time. I have read books, I have listened to every ones advice, and NOTHING! In all of the books they always say "most" babies can be sleep trained...well I am here to tell you all that my baby falls into the dreaded "non-trainable" category!
Lately I have kinda just told myself "she won't stay awake forever"...or "she will grow out of this"! So I have kinda just let it go for now. I have felt like she will grow out of this time, and I just need to suck it up and let her be herself. I have felt like she just needed her mommy to comfort her at night, and so I would just be there for her. (disclaimer: when I say "at night" I mean waking up 5 times, wanting to sleep with me, wanting a boob in her mouth all night, and then waking up at the crack of dawn).
Well last night was truly my LAST, and VERY LAST straw! Seriously...something snapped in me. I don't know what happened? I got her to go to bed, and then told Spencer to go and get a movie, and some treats (by treats I mean chili cheese Frito's, and oreos...yes that is why I am still not losing weight). I feel like me and Spencer needed some quality time together. So I sent him away. I checked blogs, and then Spencer got home, and we started the movie. Well about 10 mins into it, Grace woke up. I went and got her, and rocked her back to sleep, and then laid her down. Before I could even make it back to the couch, she was awake again. I rocked her back to sleep, and then laid her down again...this happened about 3 more times. Finally I just held her. He and Spencer had no quality time together...and I missed like half the movie. Finally I laid down in bed with her, and she just sat and squirmed. She just wanted to play. I SNAPPED! I was so beyond done! It has been like this for 8 months now. I was D-O-N-E!!!!! So I laid her in her bed. She started screaming right away, I walked out, and laid in bed, and started to cry. I just sat there and cried, and prayed...for TWO HOURS! I told the lord that I would pray in till she went to sleep. That was two hours. It actually went by fast..probably with some "magic heavenly father dust", and she feel asleep. I was SOOOOOOo excited! She woke up about 10 mins after that...and I started to cry again. But my wonderful husband stepped up to the plate, and prayed till she feel asleep again. She slept till morning.
So this afternoon, I tried again. She wasn't letting me rock her to sleep, so I layed her down. She cried for about 3 hours...so I finally went and got her. (disclaimer: she was still standing up after 3 hours...yes that is called "karma"...and stubbornness). She feel asleep in my arms almost right away. She is sleeping right now...but to tell you all the truth I feel like we are on the right path! I feel like in the next month or so she will finally start sleeping! I don't' know if that is false hope...but I am holding onto it. I am DONE (like I said before) with no sleep. I don't' feel bad for her when she is standing in there crying. I am the mom, and she is my daughter, and she can't be in control anymore. I am taking BACK THE CONTROL, and she is sleeping. I don't' care how long she cries...she is going to sleep though the night, and there are no "if's, and's, or but's" about it!
So the moral of this story is that now I AM grateful to my mother for staying up with me all of those nights. I am SOOOO grateful! Moms are the best! And that now I have my own little girl that won't sleep, and that is called KARMA!
8 comments:
Let her Cry!!!
Let her Cry!!!
Let her Cry!!!
She KNOWS that you are going to get her, if you will let her cry it out, as long as she is not hungry, messy, or sick, crying is the ONLY thing that works. She will decrease her time crying each night. She will figure out that you are NOT coming to get her. Have your mom come over until she is asleep....let her listen to her cry....LET HER CRY!!! That is my advice...let's just say...Mother of three!
Oh, Jami. This almost made ME cry! I can't imagine how hard it's been all these months, and then to just pray for two hours straight...and THEN to have spencer take over the praying.
That would make a really good object lesson for a sacrament meeting talk. Too bad you just spoke.
I love you sooooo much. You are an amazing young lady. If anyone can figure it out, I know you can.
So sorry she ia not a good sleeper...that is so hard. I'm one of the "cry it out" moms too. As hard as it is, it seemed to be the best for my kids. Jaxson learned at a young age to fall asleep by himself. When I couldn't take the crying I would just turn up the tv and have my husband listen to make sure they were ok. But, the crying doesn't last long...soon she will be a sleeping pro and you will feel back to normal!
So sorry she ia not a good sleeper...that is so hard. I'm one of the "cry it out" moms too. As hard as it is, it seemed to be the best for my kids. Jaxson learned at a young age to fall asleep by himself. When I couldn't take the crying I would just turn up the tv and have my husband listen to make sure they were ok. But, the crying doesn't last long...soon she will be a sleeping pro and you will feel back to normal!
Stick with it Jami! It will get better. She'll learn!
Um Mother of 2 and almost a half! I had exactly the same experience with both girls, crying never worked!! I am sorry everyone has to find what works for them. I totally feel for you especially the crying and hyperventilating for 3 hours only to sleep for 10 min and then start all over again. Call me, I will tell you what I did! But again there is not any ONE THING that works for EVERYONE! (sorry anonymous made me cranky)
I never had it in me to let my kids cry it out. You're being very brave. With our fifth little ankle biter I had a tough time getting her to sleep for a while. Nothing like what you are dealing with though.
I had to think about how she fell asleep before... What was different now... What did I do then that I wasn't doing now... On and on. What does she like? Well, when I was breast feeding her I realized she would hang on to my "silky" shirt in the back with one hand and in the front with the other hand. She was basically getting herself to sleep by rubbing this material between her fingers. After I figured it out I gave her a "silky" of her very own. She still goes to sleep this way every once in a while and she's five and a half years old. She will come into my room and say, "Mom, can I borrow one of your silky slips just for tonight and I promise to give it back in the morning." :) Your little one might need something like that...
I think when babies are crying, it is their only way of telling us that something isn't quite right... What does your gut say? Your instincts? What does your Pediatrician say? Why don't we as adults sleep when we need to? Stress, something we are worried about, pain, don't want to miss anything, ie; cleaning, work, studying, an idea, T.V.,computer, friends, games, a good book,...
Good luck.
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